Listen to Me Talk About Makeup

I heard that “haul vids” are the bane of the internet, and I thought to myself, why not do one of them anyway. Except I’m not into vlogging, so here it is, analog style. Ready? LET’S GO!

hahaha oh hannah you cad

Actually, wait, I want to do another preface: these things that I’m about to go on about do not matter or make me into a better person. I budgeted these purchases into this month’s expenses. I looked at lots of stuff while I was out, and I basically only purchased items that replace old items that I’ve run out of. It is still a luxury, though, to get to use these things, and that’s why I’m so excited! Look at this luxurious stuff I’m about to enjoy! Guys! Look!


The Fresh Farmacy Face Soap is for me and JJ and our sensitive baby skin. It’s got a great chamomiley smell and it lathers beautifully. I also got a few bath melts that I’ve never tried before; I take a lot of baths in the winter, and the melts help keep my skin from drying out. I use bath-time to read all the books that I was too hamboned to read during the summer. Keepin’ it classy since ’06. Lush was having a BOGO sale today on their winter stuff, so I grabbed some soap and shower gel for mom and grandma. I think I may keep a bottle of Twilight, and this here Mr. Punch soap, whose main ingredient appears to be booze. I did not go in there thinking that I’d buy extra soaps, but they got me with their BOGO wiles. Every time! The staff was kind and cheerful, as always. They were assigning a celebrity to match each bath product. FYI, the Mmm bath melt (the cupcakey pink one pictured above) is Channing Tatum.

fings for my face

Sephora! I love you when you’re not churning with a frenzied wave of beauty junkies. I got a sample of BB cream last time I was there, and holy crackers, was I ever impressed. BB cream falls somewhere between tinted moisturizer and foundation, which works for me and the amount of effort that I’m willing to put into doing my makeup. So I bought a tube! I also got an Urban Decay Brow Box to replace my Urban Decay Urbanbrow Precision-Tip Brow Tint, which I’ve absolutely struggled with. The Urbanbrow gets these weird, sticky, tarry clumps whenever you use it. Everything else pictured was free! I shouldn’t have even gotten the birthday lipgloss, but due to a processing error, they didn’t know that I had already gotten it in November! Eeheehee! I felt bad…but I had already lost one tube, and I liked it so, so much…do you think I’ll go to jail? I got that Lancome serum for free using some of my points (the lady whose job it is to sell me things told me that it’s never too early to start using serum, lots of serum, copious amounts of expensive serum all day every day) and then I got some more promo-serum without using my points at all!

That’s it! My entire haul in two neat little paragraphs. You made it through! Now I’m gonna show you what’s been in my makeup bag this winter. SHHHHHHHHH

sometimes you just make me so mad

Let’s start with the face!

or love yourself without it, whatever

Smashbox Photo Finish Primer makes your skin smoother than silk. Imagine perfect moisture levels and a complete absence of friction. It’s beautiful. I layer on some Stila BB Cream and some Bare Minerals powder in areas where I want extra help. My Laura Mercier green translucent power goes into my purse to tone down redness and shine while I’m out boozing.


My eyeballs (ok just the lids) get a bit of primer before I throw on some neutral, natural shadows. I painstakingly fill in my brows with the Urbanbrow (not anymore, you little SOB, you’re banished to the pile of shame), and paint some wings on my lids with the Lise Watier liner. I highlight under my brows with the Anastasia stick, and slap on a coat of the Cargo Lash Activator–a mascara that I recommend you expose to the air for a wee bit before you try brushing it on. (Not pictured: my eyelash curler, which is a damn shame because it’s beautiful.)

I don’t have a picture for my lip process, because it’s usually just some degree of pink or purple gloss. Use your imagination! As you can tell, it’s a pretty basic look I go for. Are you surprised at the amount of product that goes into it? Did you expect more or less? What’s in your makeup bag?

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