I wanted to present my Community fanfic without fanfare. But, as you know by now, I can’t do anything without over-analyzing it and taking you all along for the ride!
But first, hey, what’s the real difference between over-analyzing and intellectualizing? One sounds like it’s better because its root word is “intellect”. Let’s use that one from now on.
Ok, fanfic. You know how in Paradigms of Human Memory there’s this scene where the study group is in a padded room suffering from mercury poisoning, and Jeff is going on about Harrison Ford irradiating testicles with microwave satellites? I thought that I’d write the episode that shows how they wound up in there. I had ideas and everything! I talked about doing it and stuff. Then I did it. And now it’s here. I’m gonna stop compulsively editing it, closing it, editing it, closing without saving, editing… and I’m gonna put it on the internet. I’m gonna insert it into this post, and then you’ll click it, and then you’ll read it. The words and everything. Even if there’s mistakes that I missed! You’ll see them! I’m stalling.
What’s the real difference between procrastination and stalling? If the work is done but not submitted, are you procrastinating? What are the socioeconomic effects? Maybe I ought to do an in-depth study that I don’t share before I share anything else.
Enough. It’s just that I really would like to present the script to you accompanied by an essay that painstakingly lays out its context in relation to the rest of the show– in an effort to display how seriously I take participation in fandoms that I’m undeserving of participation in. But I think that taking, like, a year to finally write it (and, like, a month to share it, even though it’s been done, sitting on my desktop, waiting (hey and then leaving this post in limbo for a week hahaha oh boy)), displays my social anxiety more than sufficiently. I just really hope nobody thinks me narcissistic (hahaha oh boy)!
But Donald Glover posted some notes in Instagram this week that resonated in me. So I’m thinking enough is enough. Enough. Enough! I’m going to share it and I’m not going to talk it down. You know why? Because it was my first try, and I still did a good job. A lot of the time your first try really stinks, but I did good work. I got inspired to do something that I love, by something that I love. And love is worth celebrating! So, in the words of Isabelle from Animal Crossing, if you’ll all take out the item that I passed out earlier… 3, 2, 1, …POP!